A Tale of Grace

Dearest Friends and Family,

            We found some hilarious jokes in Anni’s diary which we wanted to share…On tours stops in India, and sometimes elsewhere, Amma occasionally will ask for a joke.  While we never had the chance to give Her any,  we wanted to be prepared. Trying to keep a ready repertoire of jokes on hand, was an ongoing effort on our part, and we made efforts to find good jokes, and prepare them in the event that we were ever called.

These two anecdotes, talk about situations with Brahmachari Gurudas, or Gurudas, as he is more commonly known.  Our family nickname for him (and we have nicknames for everybody) is Goo-dasy.  He is a hardworking brahmachari, who for the most part has been a real human being to us, acting as a family friend to the children,  sharing stories of Amma and spiritual concepts with us.  We came to know him in this regard through numerous small projects that we began to beautify the area around Amma’s room,  over the years, which often entailed his assistance in his more official capacity for securing bricks, cement, masons (he himself knows masonry also) etc. 

From a distance, it appears that he is always busy. It appears he has numerous ashram duties,  of various types of physical labor, from working with the laborers, hauling sand, cement,  cleaning the cow shed, being night duty guard attendant, dealing with the waste, setting up latrines,  the kitchen, etc., etc., really, his activities are so numerous it is hard to say what all he does.   He is always ready to lend a hand to anyone, for anything.   Along with Brahmachari John, he also attends to the funerals,   and disposal of ashes ceremonies, and was there with us when Anni’s ashes pot was thrown into the sea.  We used to take care of the darshan hut, and this story is from that time, one day when Anni and Link were working on it..  Anni entitled it:

“Repairing the Darshan Hut

One day, before Amma came back from some foreign tour, in 2003,  Gurudas decided that it was time to paint the Darshan hut roof. [this must mean the poles that hold up the thatch roof].  So accordingly, Lincoln and he brought in two tables (to tie together); so that one may reach the roof.  As we were tying them together, Gurudas looked at me and said:

“See, you’re not tying them tight enough.  When you tie, they should be so tight that your face turns purple, and an onlooker should be able to distinctly see the outline of every muscle in your face, and your veins should bulge and your eyes should bug out.”

After we were finished with the tedious task, he turned to me and said,

“You’ve still not tied it tight enough.”

“Yes, I did.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“Yes, I tell you, I did”

“Then will you get up and stand there?” he asked.

“Of course I will, “ I said, preparing to climb to the top.

“How do you know it won’t fall?”

“You two tied the other 3 legs.”

“Ay!” he said, “but we were all thinking the same thing!”

On tours, besides various duties, Gurudas also is the person who hands out tokens for darshan with Amma on the gents side.  In India, this can be a very powerful as well as dangerous position.  Once Amma starts darshan in the outside programs, where often 100,000 and more people are desperately wanting to get a token to see Her, and get in line, so as not to wait the whole night…the token man is in very hot demand. We have seen, with our own eyes,  from a helpless distance, Gurudas roughed up by a burly mob, the hair on his head in several peoples fists, his beard in the grip of other fists which rocked his head to and fro, demanding his personal attention.  It was after this that Gurudas began going on all the tours completely clean shaven.  Amma often jokes about this.  

It appears that Gurudas suffers an inner conflict.  There is his duty as Amma has told him – to give tokens out to the hundreds of thousands of people.  There is his duty as a spiritual son of Amma, to see that Amma’s form is kept well and safe.  When the darshans are very heavy, going 12 and more hours, sometimes 24 hours,  it is very hard to be kind or patient with hundreds of people who have just come,  and want to get darshan for a program which had begun the previous day!  Anni’s story exemplies this conflict in a way, well known on the Indian Tours.  She entitled it:

“Token Man

In Palakkad tour, [Northern Kerala] 2002, I was walking towards the Canteen and kitchen around 11:30 PM.  On my way, at least 3 people asked me where the ‘Token man’ was.

“I don’t know, maybe around Amma,” came the reply. (Tokens are only distributed until 12:00 AM) [time was fast running out for the token-less]

When I reached the kitchen, who should I see there, but Gurudas, the long lost ‘token man’ sitting in the far corner of the inaccessible store room, with a stack of tokens in his hand, looking around thoughtfully….”

That’s all for now.

Loving you,

Kamala Aunty, Anni and Link

Dearest Friends and Family,

            Tomorrow is the celebration of Amma’s official birthday here in Amritapuri.  The celebrations have started fully today, and there are tens of thousands of people in the ashram.  I haven’t gone down yet today…the crowds are thick…every time I look over at the bridge that we made after the Tsunami, to connect the island with the mainland, there is a thick human stream, like a river flowing in both directions, coming and going over it.  This year, I feel the greatest service I can do, is to stay out of the way.  We don’t have much heart for a party.

            We are very slow at going over Anni’s works.  We went though all her school notebooks a week or so ago…looking for her doodles, or any signs of self expression.  It is unfortunate that the schooling system here, even on the university level, really discourages self expression and genuine analysis.  I found comments from teachers on her exams chiding her for expressing her own opinions…if only they could realize how their own stilted thinking prevents India’s progress…. We are keeping aside all of her doodles.

            What amazes me is how many little sayings captured her attention.  She always wrote down little bits of wisdom that she found.  And rewrote them in later journals.  She was unconcerned about their source,  only in the way they struck her heart.  What amazes me also, is how they are mostly all about love.  I am ever in awe of her pure, sweet heart.

Here are 9 of her inspirational quips:

1. “When the power of love overcomes the love of power…then the world will know peace.”
2. He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, while he who has an enemy shall meet him everywhere.
3. The best way to cheer yourself up, is to cheer somebody else up.
4. The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn.
5. Reality is wrong.  Dreams are for real.
6. The only abnormality is the incapacity to love.
7. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
8. God is that which the blind can see, to whom the lame can walk, to whom the dumb can speak…
9. God is there in everyone’s eyes, they only don’t know it.  We should be able to see God there, in their eyes, even when they don’t know it, for She is ever-present.  Have faith in that.”

Wishing you love and peace,

Kamala Aunty, Anni and Link

Dearest Friends and Family,

There is something else I wanted to discuss. It is what I feel to be an erroneous ‘spiritual’ concept of a Mother’s blind attachment to her child. Attachment, in some circles around me, is considered a hindrance to ‘spiritual advancement’ a sign of holding onto this world of name and form, and therefore, to an ultimate delusion, as this is a place of constant change, not our real home, etc., etc.
Not all Mothers are able to truly love their children. It’s always amazing to me, but, in my experience, it is true. Perhaps it is more, that due to certain negative mental tendencies in themselves, they are unable to show that love in constructive, responsible and meaningful ways for the child. For those that do though, they will bear witness with me, that the child is really the mother of the mother. For it is the child who teaches us small Mothers, of which I am one, how to hear and be the Mother within. Through open, attentive listening to the unspoken needs and honoring and deeply respecting the directions of the child, the Mother unveils herself, within the small Mother.
So who is it that is unveiled? The true Mother is nothing less than the great author of the music that turns the spheres, and of the spheres themselves. It is the same Great Mother in the ‘little mother’. Although the ability to become aware of this is easily accessible to all, particularly females, for me, the birth and experience of becoming a small Mother to my children, Link and Anni, has most clearly revealed and defined this. I know many of my failings, yet, I have watched and seen the depthless One, that a Mother and child always are, reveal its wisdom and knowledge for my babies and myself as an indivisible part of them.
The joy of mothering is that one can watch and see this Great Mother within oneself, and say “I’ , demonstrating to ones’ own mind, a divine sense of self identification with the Great Mother. Even though a biological Mother may be a ‘small’ Mother, she is an undeniable part of the Great Mother energy. It is the unique prerogative of anyone who unveils that Mother within themselves, either through mothering their own children, or others, or mothering other beings in the Creation. Once it is awakened, it is truthful and unerring in knowing the positive directions for the child. It is fearless wisdom incarnate.
In my observations, for many small Mothers, the gestation of the child, births the Mother. I have known many women who have lost their baby during gestation. The Mother’s body undergoes a tremendous sense of loss and grieving, which deeply affects the psychological state of the would-be Mother. Why? The body itself had been programmed to see the baby through until physical birth. By what? How can we call this stage – the unborn child, its loss, and consequent grieving, attachment? This is not attachment. This is the cry of the body and the unformed imprints left on the heart of the would-be Mother, to see the child through, to see it born.
And after the child is born? Even after a normal birth, the Mother’s body goes through a slightly depressed state, the ‘woos” as a friend of mine called them. It’s a time of grieving the loss of closeness and cellular security that gestation meant. None of this is false or petty attachment. All of this springs from the depths of duty, dharma, righteousness, purity to hold safe and guide the child in the directions right for him or her. It is the creative and sustaining or preserving force of the Universe. These two aspects of the conception of God in Sanatan Dharma [eternal truth, Hinduism] , comprise two thirds of the God head, viewed as Creative, Preserving and Destructive.
The road for the child within the heart of the mother blazes clear in her. All the ways to guide the child, what to watch out for, the font of unconditional love – are awoken. This is not attachment, this is the wellspring of dharma, purity and truth, that comes from the Great Mother manifesting in the ‘little mother’. When little Mothers cannot be pure and true to the Great Mother within them, due to their own mind problems, it can very negatively affect the child. Very few small Mothers can be true to that unconditional love within them for their child, although, it is still there.
It is a great pity and loss for mankind that the wonderous, unifying essence of Motherhood is so devalued, so disrespected, even by small Mothers themselves in what is termed ‘modern’ and ‘technical’ societies. Even in India now, we see the lower middle classes, with young mothers working 12 hour shifts, and children in crèches and day care centers for the entire time. Add to this the poisonous toxins of soap operas, copied on American models of viperous and totally unsisterly behaviors between women, and we have the great human culture of India, disintegrating in leaps and bounds before our eyes.
As a single mother, coming from America to India, with two small children to raise, I could feel the general societal acknowledgement of the relevance of the Great Mother within every little Mother, within me. It is a culture that as yet, worships the Great Mother. I am grateful. It made raising my children with values of respect, honesty, helpfulness, peacefulness, self-restraint, hardworkingness, etc. much easier despite the ignorance we faced due to the lack of an outer father figure. It was just expected that my children would want to listen to, and follow the advises of their mother. That they would recognize her relevance to them. In western countries, rebellion against the mother is an encouraged norm. Perhaps it is because the small Mothers there are themselves not able to be responsive, or truly respect the Great Mother within themselves or in other small mothers.
To my mind, to see a Mother’s undying love for her child as ‘attachment’ is gross and glaring ignorance, displaying rather the smallness of understanding of such a thinker. I feel the scriptures and many religious texts and stories need to be re-written and/or re-interpreted to bring a better understanding to light. It is a great pity and loss to the development of human civilization that women the world over are being ‘spiritually’ educated to decry and devalue in anyway the great gift within them, which is the source of the universe itself. To be or become a perfect mother, that is, one who has no more tendencies which can stop, hinder, or warp the flow of energy of the knowingness and love of the Great Mother within for the child, or children, or the entire creation, is an open path in one in whom even small Motherhood is awakened.
The way of the Mother is very fast. Perhaps this is why women tend to be more pious, peaceful, spiritually advanced as a whole, than men. Connection to the Great Mother, being such a normal and natural state, has not been made into religious orders, with special clothes and colors. Yet, so many children know that their Mothers were the Great Mother. So many adults from different religions tell me, “My Mother was a real Saint!” and mean it sincerely. The towering heights of genuinely deep spirituality attained by unknown, unnamed, millions of Mothers, are far above the need for socialized spiritual distinction and methods of measurement devised by aggressive and competitive male –kind. No where do we see or hear of Two Great Mother Yogini’s arguing intellectually for days, or madly taking vows or fasts or giving curses, or begging boons to spiritually one-up themselves over other sages or to seek self advancement in anyway. Nor would we. Those are the ways of small children, not the Great Mother, who depths are all embracing love, silence, peace and stillness.
The Path of the Great Mother is the easiest, the most accessible. Perhaps that is why Holy Mother Amma lives it for us. Through the expansive love filled path of selfless caring, one becomes That. All true Mothers know this. All small Mothers share a common source in their Motherhood. As a small Mother, I find I am always in the presence of the Great Mother, it is an intrinsic part of me, it is me, as far as I can be true to it. For me, that means to love fearlessly. I have to strive for that. My love, longing and agony for Anni has nothing to do with attachment, and everything to do with dharma, as part of her Great Mother.
I welcome your comments. Please feel free to disagree and argue vociferously.
[note! It has come to our attention that excerpts from the blog are being used elsewhere. We don’t have a problem with that, for small 2-5 word phrases, acknowledgement is not necessary, more than that, let your conscience guide you.]
Loving you,
Kamala Aunty

Dearest Friends and Family,
We have received lots of inquiries on how to do coffee enemas. We learned to do them through the Gerson Therapy, which we sought to apply for Anni. For us, we were not able to conduct the Gerson Therapy as it is meant to be done, for someone as sick as Anni was. The Therapy as a whole, for someone in Anni’s situation, needs to be done under the direct supervision of a medical doctor who has also been trained in Dr. Max Gerson’s methodologies. Unfortunately, there were none such in the United States of America, when we were there. The laws in the USA will take away the license of any medical doctor practicing the Gerson Therapy. Perhaps because it represents a threat to industries and business that thrive on sickness…the doctors there now are really pharmaceutical medical technicians. When people can take their healing into their own hands, and, especially, exercise preventive health care, then who makes money?
What follows is all that I have been able to find about the Gerson Coffee Enemas from two books published by the Gerson Institute plus our own experience:
(1) Gerson, C. and Walker, M. (2001). The Gerson Therapy: the Proven Nutritional Program for Cancer and Other Illnesses. Kensington. NY Copyright by Walker, M. and Gerson Institute.
This will be referenced as GT.
(2) Gerson Institute, (1999) Gerson Therapy Handbook. (revised 5th edition) Gerson Institute, San Diego, CA.
This will be referenced as GH.

[Note!] “Coffee enemas are safe when used within the context of the combined regime of the Gerson Therapy. Dr. Gerson’s stated intention in supplying a sodium-restricted, high potassium, high-micronutrient diet of fruits, vegetables and whole grains was to supply all nutrients, known and unknown which are necessary for cell respiration and energy production.” (pp.163-164, GT)

“Origins of Coffee Enemas as Gerson Therapy
The much disputed, ridiculed and controversial coffee enemas have an unusual origin in becoming a primary component of the Gerson Therapy.
Certainly enemas are not new, they were transcribed as part of the Manual of Discipline, , recorded two thousand years ago, comprising one of the books in the Dead Sea Scrolls. Also, The Essence Gospel of Peace, a third-century Aramaic manuscript found in the secret archives of the Vatican, strongly advises about the taking of enemas….(pg.156. GT) [then there is a lengthy quote, of which I will only put the following:]
“Seek, therefore, a large trailing gourd, having a stalk the length of a man, take out its inwards and fill it with water from the river which the sun has warmed. Hang it upon the branch of a tree, and kneel upon the ground before the angel of water, and suffer the end of the stalk of the trailing gourd to enter your hinder parts, that the water may flow through all your bowels. Afterwards rest kneeling on the ground before the angel of water and pray to the living God that he will forgive you all your past sins, and pray to the angel of water that he will free your body from every uncleanness and disease. Then let the water run out from your body, that it may carry away from within it all the unclean and evil-smelling things of Satan. And you shall see with your eyes and smell with your nose all the abominations and uncleannesses which defiled the temple of your body… (pps. 156-157 GT)
“So enemas have been used for general purposes of detoxification since ancient times. However the use of coffee to increase the effectiveness of treatment and to reduce pain probably dates back only to the time of the First World War. A Gerson Therapy exponent, Dr. Jeffery Walters, tells the following story about the original administrations of enemas containing the coffee beverage:
During WW1, Germany was surrounded by the Allies’ military forces, and many imported materials were short or missing for German citizens. Among other things, morphine was running very low in supply. Also there was hardly any coffee available to drink. Moreover, painkillers, anesthetics and other drugs were lacking too. When soldiers were sent back from the front lines, severely wounded, and in need of surgery, there usually was just a bit of anesthesia available – perhaps only enough to get them through the surgical operation.
When the anesthesia wore off, obviously the pain set in for the wounded soldier. In many cases, after the doctors finished operating, they ordered plain water enemas for the patients. But the nurses were desperately looking for something more to help the soldiers deal with their pain.
It happened that there was always coffee brewing, available only for the surgeons to drink. They often had to work around the clock, and needed to be kept awake by caffeine in the beverage. Sometimes a little of their black coffee was left over. Apparently, some nurse that the idea, that, since the coffee was doing the surgeons good, perhaps it would also help the soldiers. So the nurses poured a quantity of the leftover coffee into the soldiers’ enema buckets. The soldiers receiving coffee enemas reported that these were doing them some good, and that their pain was much relieved.” (p.157 GT)
“These reports coming out of WW1 aroused the interest of two researchers, Prof. O.A, Meyers, MD and Prof. Martin Heubner, MD, at the German University of Goettingen’s College of Medicine…During the 1920’s, these two medical professors further examined the effect of caffeine when given rectally to rats. They observed that the caffeinated enemas stimulated the laboratory animal’ bile ducts to open, and the professors then published their findings in the German medical literature.
For some time after learning of this research…Dr. Max Gerson used a combination of the two drugs, caffeine and potassium citrate, in the form of drops that were added to the enema water. But he found later that a solution simply made by boiling coffee grounds was more effective and was much more easily available to everybody who wanted to take coffee enemas. Thus, Dr. Gerson incorporated a program of detoxification using coffee enemas into the Gerson Therapy, and the same procedure remains today.” (p.158, GT)

“The Beneficial Action of a Coffee Enema
…

During a 1985 conference on cancer treatment, conducted by…Harold Manner, Ph.D, …Dr. Manner discussed the internal workings of a coffee enema…
While the coffee enema is being retained in the gut (for an optimum period ranging from twelve to fifteen minutes), all of the body’s blood passes through the liver every three minutes. The hemorrhoidal blood vessels dilate from exposure to the caffeine, in turn, the liver’s portal veins dilate too. Simultaneously, the bile ducts expand with blood, the bile flow increases, and the smooth muscles of these internal organs relax. The blood serum and its many components are detoxified as this vital fluid passes through the individual’s caffeinated liver. The quart of water being retained in the bowel stimulates the visceral nervous system, promoting peristalsis. The water delivered through the bowel dilutes the bile and causes an even greater increase in bile flow. There is a flushing of toxic bile which is further affected by the body’s enzymatic catalyst known to physicians as glutathione S-transferase (GST).
The GST is increased in quantity in the small bowel by 700 percent, which has an excellent physiological effect, because this enzyme quenches free radicals. These quenched free radicals leave the liver and gallbladder as bile salts flowing through the duodenum. The bile salts are carried away by perstalsis in the gut, traveling from the small intestine, through the colon, and out the rectum.
In 1990, the Austrian surgeon Peter Lechner, MD…[reported these benefits about GST in the gut]…:

• GST bunds bilirubin and its glucuronides so that they can be eliminated from the hepatocytes (liver cells)
• GST blocks and detoxifies carcinogens, which require oxidation or reduction to be activated. Its catalytic function produces a protective effect against many chemical carcinogens.
• GST forms a covalent bond with nearly all highly electrophilic (free radical) substances, which is the precondition of their elimination from the body. The intermediate products of potential liver poisons (hepatotoxic cytostatics) also belong in this category of forming free radical pathology.” (pp.158-159 GT)

[a few more doctors are quoted, then] “The detoxifying of cancer cells has been demonstrated innumerable times by experiments on laboratory mice wherein detoxification of the liver increases by 600 percent and the small bowel detoxifies by 700 percent when coffee beans are added to the animals’ diet. Analogous results take place within humans who are giving themselves coffee enemas.” (p.160, GT)

“Coffee enemas cause excretion of Cancer Breakdown Products

The coffee enema has a very specific purpose in the treatment and reversal of degenerative diseases. As stated by Dr. P. Lechner, it lowers the quantity of blood serum toxins, literally cleaning the poisons out of fluids nourishing normal cells. Invariably, some small quantities of poisons are contained therein. Each cell is challenged by toxins, oxygen starvation, malnutrition, or trauma which collectively alter the cell’s molecular configuration and cause it to lose its preference for potassium. As explained….sodium competes with potassium for association sites in damaged cells.” (p.160-161 GT)

[As Amma, many Rishi’s and also Gandhi recommend, the Gerson diet is saltless. I won’t give all the technical medical reasons, but these paragraphs provide a clear picture of the damaging effects of salt to the body cells in the diet especially of a sick person]

“Loss of cellular potassium and increase of cellular sodium results in decreased electron flow though the damaged cell, which some biochemists refer to as a macromolecule. This injured macromolecule becomes unattractive to paramagnetic ions and a subsequent disorganization of water molecules may take place. Because bulk-phase water, structure in a high energy state, is the main mechanism controlling cellular water content and purity, any disturbance in water structuring will result in the cell’s swelling with excess water and extra cellular solute. When the internal environment of the macromolecule becomes polluted with excess water and extra cellular materials, mitochondrial production of ATP (adenosine triphosphate) is greatly impaired. The result is that macromolecules cannot produce sufficient energy to repair themselves unless the challenge is removed.”

“Endogenous serum toxins can be generated within macromolecules by bacteria and by malignant cells. It has been observed that surrounding almost any active malignancies are spheres of damaged normal tissue in which water structuring is impaired by the chronic insult of tumor toxins. Energy production and immunity are depressed in the macromolecules, which are swollen with excess salt and water. Such damaged tissue possesses a decreased blood circulation because oversized edematous cells crowd together inside the capillaries, arterioles and lymph ducts.
Teaching that improved blood circulation and tissue integrity would prevent the spread and cause the destruction of malignancies, Max Gerson, MD, held it as axiomatic that no cancer could exist in the presence of normal metabolism. …

Enzyme systems in the liver and small bowel are responsible for conversion and neutralization of the four most common tissue toxins, polyamines, ammonia, toxic bound nitrogen, and electrophiles, all of which can cause cell and membrane damage. Such protective liver and gut enzyme systems are massively increased in their beneficial effects by coffee enemas….[then, from an article taken from Physiological Chemistry and Physics in the 1970’s]…Caffeine enemas cause dilation of bile ducts, which facilitates excretion of toxic cancer breakdown products by the liver and dialysis of toxic products from blood across the colonic wall. (pp.160-161)
“The coffee enema is in a class by itself as a therapeutic agent. In no way does the oral administration of beverage coffee have the same effect as its rectal administration. On the contrary, drinking coffee virtually ensures re-absorption of toxic bile…it is a physiological fact that bile is normally reabsorbed up to ten times by the body before working its way out of the intestines in feces. The enzyme –intensifying ability of the coffee enema is unique among choleretics…it does not allow re-absroption of toxic bile by the liver across the gut wall, it is an entirely effective means of detoxifying the bloodstream through existing enzyme systems in both the liver and the small intestine….(pp.162-163 GT)

“Summarizing the physiological benefits of Coffee Enemas
…
Introducing a quart of boiled coffee solution into the colon will accomplish the following physiological benefits.

• It dilutes portal blood and subsequently, the bile.
• Theophylline and theobromine, major nutraceutical constituents of coffee, dilate blood vessels and counter inflammation of the gut.
• The palmitates of coffee enhance glutathione S-transferase, which is responsible for the removal of many toxic radicals from blood serum
• The fluid of the enema itself stimulates the visceral nervous system, promoting peristalsis and the transit of diluted toxic radicals from the duodenum out the rectum.
• Because the stimulating enema is retained for up to fifteen minutes, and because all the blood in the body passes through the liver nearly every three minutes, coffee enemas represent a form of dialysis of blood across the gut wall.

What you will need for a coffee enema

1. An enema kit! We use something that looks like a hot water bottle that we got from a nationwide chainstore called Walgreens in the US. It was about $12 there. Whatever you get, make sure it is something you can clean it out easily, that can air dry thoroughly. I like the Walgreens’ one, as we can boil the plastic part that goes into the rectum if we feel it is needed.
   The kit needs to have a way to hang it or be stable to put on a table.
   Whatever you get needs to be able to hold at least 32 ounces or 1 litre of coffee solution, and have a tube long enough to hang 18 inches or 50 CM’s above your body, and cover the distance to your rectum.
   The Gerson Institute uses a bucket system, with a catheter type tube. It is probably possible to make an enema kit from a food grade plastic bottle, a cork and catheter tubing with a clamp of some sort – maybe a strong clothespin or some such. Since there is such a big interest here, we are going to look into how we can do it, as the necessary size is not available commercially. Often, just bending the tube on itself, and keeping it pinched stops the flow.
2. A mat /cloth to lie on, and for spills.
3. Organic coffee and distilled or boiled filtered water. A stainless steel or ceramic or pyrex pot for boiling the coffee solution with a good lid.
4. A timer or watch or clock where you can see it.
5. Other accoutrements to be warm and comfortable.

Making the coffee solution

“In his writing, the formulation…offered as the best coffee enema concentration is the following: [note! Coffee must be organic]

1. Take three rounded tablespoonfuls of drip-grind coffee and add them to a quart of boiling water (use distilled water if your drinking water is furnished from a fluoridated water source, use filtered water if you reside in an average drinking water area.” (p.170 GT) [“It is very important for all fluids that are placed in the rectum to be sterile. Use boiled water only!” p.18 GH]
2. “Let the mixture boil for three minutes uncovered and allow it to simmer for another fifteen minutes more, covered.” (p.170 GT) [“to drive off oils” p.18 GH]
3. “Strain the solution through a fine strainer to catch floating coffee grounds. Or empty a coarser strainer lined with a filter cloth, such as an old used piece of white sheeting or a piece cut from a knit undershirt. Add enough hot water to refill a glass container up to the 1 quart level. (some water will have been lost in boiling and straining.). (p.170, GT)
4. “Fill a quart glass container with the liquid and let cool to body temperature.
5. “Use this solution at body temperature for purposes of bowel infusion.” (p.169 GT)

How to do a coffee enema

“Dr. Gerson suggests that the individual assume a specific body position when taking a coffee enema. He writes: “To make enemas most effective, the patient should lie on his right side, with both legs drawn close to the abdomen, and breathe deeply, in order to suck the greatest amount of fluid into all parts of the colon. The fluid should be retained ten to fifteen minutes.” (pps. 168-169 GT)

“If due to pain, the patient is unable to lie on the right side, it is acceptable to lie on one’s back, also with legs pulled up. Lie on the left side only as a last resort because the coffee enema goes deeper into the bowel most effectively from the right side.” (p.171 GT)

[we lie right side, on a plastic mat on the floor, with a thin towel or large rag for the lower body parts. I use a small pillow, keep a timer near me, and have reading material at hand. It can be a nice, inward time, despite the internal pressures. In the US, we did it in the bathroom itself, here, as the floor of the bathroom is most often wet, very near to the bathroom. A blanket in cold climes can be useful. The goal – be comfortable and relaxed. If you need to do it at bed level, protect the bedding and mattress appropriately. If unable to retain, the liquid will come jetting out. Keep this in mind.]

Gerson Caregiver Shirley Tice taught us that the tube needs to be only inserted 2-3 inches into the anus. Once ready to start the enema, we run a little of the solution out through the tube then re-clamp it, so that air in the tube will be displaced, and not enter the colon.

“Before you start your coffee enema, eat a small piece of fruit to activate the gastric tract. If enema is taken on an empty stomach, some people may experience problems.” (p.19 GH)
“Take your time letting gravity force the fluid into your rectum and bowel. Have the bottom of an enema bog or bucket elevated only about 18 inches above the tube’s end that is penetrating one’s anus. (p. 171 GT)
“As we’ve mentioned - and its an important point – the enema bucket or bag should not be more than 18 inches (50 cm) above the body so the coffee does not flow into the bowel under too much pressure. The reason for this becomes all too apparent rather quickly. An excessive height could cause excessive pressure and easily set up counterperstalsis with cramping.
If cramping occurs, stop the flow of liquid, either by pinching the tube closed, or by lowering the bucket or bag to the level of the body for a little while. Then resume the enema’s flow.
A number of patients, at the start of the treatment, have reported experiencing difficulty getting a full quart of liquid into the colon. If that becomes the situation for you or your loved one, start with whatever amount is most comfortably received. Let the patient intake and hold that lesser amount, expel it, and then accept the rest of the enema.” (pps.171-172 GT)
“The enema once fully infused into the colon should, ideally, be held for from 12-15 minutes. By that time, almost all the available caffeine has been absorbed. It is not suggested to hold it longer than 15 minutes since the liquid will also be absorbed into the system. If a person cannot hold the enema for 12 minutes, he or she should do the best they can without trying desperately to retain the fluid, which could bring on abdominal cramping. If she or he can only mange say 6-9 minutes, do release the liquid at that shorter interval. Eventually, holding the coffee enema inside the bowel for 12 minutes does become quite comfortable. It merely takes practice, and some people have taken three or four months before achieving the ideal time period.” (p. 171 GT)
“Some patients find it difficult to retain 32 oz. of the liquid, you may want to start with 24 oz. and later, slowly increaset he amount of fluid.
If the enema gets ‘clutched’ and doesn’t get expelled, the Gerson Therapy recommends a ‘back-to-back” experience – take another enema. One can also apply warmth to the abdomen to relax the area. Either way, don’t worry, it will eventually come out.

We have found that it take 5- 15 minutes to expel the enema from its travels in the gut.
Our situation is such that we have to reserve the time in the bathroom. Perhaps you do too.

Well, this has taken me the whole day. We hope it will be helpful to those who use it.
In loving service to your good health,
Kamala Aunty

Dearest Friends and Family,

We want to address the concept of ‘karma’ as leading to‘destiny’ in Anni’s death. That our precious Anni died, is, we feel not due to any ‘karma”, but due to our own inability to shake the tree hard enough to find the appropriate people with the actual know-how to help us. In retrospect, our going to NIH was a huge mistake. The doctors there were unable to find or suggest even a diagnosis for 3 months. This with a person who was assumed to be in the final states of severe cancer since February. Not until MAY did we hear the feeble diagnosis! Three months! No other doctor or institution that we approached was even willing to investigate Anni’s situation once they understood that previous investigations had been done by the world re-known experts at NIH! NIH is a sacred cow in American, and perhaps world medical religiosity, so are other institutions: John Hopkins, the Mayo Clinic, etc., etc. Three months!!! while my baby suffered more and more. Its so inexcuseable. Our inability to pierce through that shroud of medical darkness surrounding us was tempered by the day to day needs of Anni as an ailing child, our need to try to make her comfortable, to try to meet her immediate crises, to be there for her as her Mother and brother.
Finding the Gerson therapy, was a godsend to us. It seemed like pure common sense. We hunted it up on internet, looking for pros and cons. We found a lot of places claiming to use the Gerson Therapy, along with things that we felt were total quackery. Finally, we found the actual Gerson Therapy, started by Dr. Max Gerson. When we called the institute in CA, they told us that although they had copyrights on the Gerson Therapy name, they did not have the funds to spend on legal instigations to ensure that others did not use and abuse their name and reputation. Anyhow, the institute now operates in CA, has a 70 bed clinic in Tijuana, Mexico, that is totally dedicated to carrying out the Gerson Therapy. At their clinic, they have trained medical doctors, who know how to apply to therapy to each individual case.
We desperately wanted Anni to go to the clinic in Tijuana and be under the medical doctors there. She was rejected by the Gerson doctors because NIH had found something abnormal looking in her brain, although it did not appear to be cancerous (from the spinal lumbar puncture tests performed on her, which were to leave her right leg twisted inward for some time ) nor infectious. Because of these results, the Gerson hospital would not take her, as once the immune system is restored to full activity, the body intelligence goes after anything abnormal, including scar tissue, old injuries, etc. They feared that Anni could possibly have a brain seizure, and were not ready to take that chance, with their more limited hospital functions.
Since we could not get Anni into the hospital there, we tried our best to approximate those conditions in the home. We got the books, videos, the Gerson Caregiver, - Shirley Tice, the veggies, the coffee, the Norwalk juicer, etc., etc. We began doing the coffee enemas. The problem was, we did not have a real doctor, versed in the Gerson Therapy to see us through. To take and examine blood tests, accurately prescribe the mineral and enzymatic supplements, etc. to see and examine Anni on a daily basis. Dr. Gerson was very particular with each patient, as his book, A Cancer Therapy;Results of fifty Cases (title also states: The Cure of Advanced Cancer by Diet Therapy; A summary of 30 years of Clinical Experimentation) shows. My god, did we need a real doctor! A doctor that could think and use common sense and the Gerson Therapy! We tried to contact a Dutch medical doctor, named Vogt, successfully using the Gerson Therapy in Holland but, he did not return our calls.
Applying the therapy in our haphazard and ignorant way, we still saw small improvements in Anni for some of those efforts. The coffee enema that she received was one area. For a while, she was doing them 4 x a day. We also began doing them once a day, and noticed a big improvement in our overall health and mental skies.
That the most precious and radiant being in our family, our irreplaceable Anni is gone, is not, we feel ‘karma’. but a tragic accident, brought about by people who were unconcerned, and/or wedded to their way of thinking and what their understanding of what ‘real’ medicine is, rather than seeking anything that would work for her. That we, her Mother and Brother were unable to disengage enough from the situation to shake the tree was due to our own emotional response which was overwhelming….we did not have the mental equanimity in that situation to see clearly where we needed to go. By grace we found the Gerson place, but did not have the shraddha or attentive alertness to get her into it. Had we, we would have omitted the brain tests done at NIH in the medical files sent to the Gerson doctors. As her Mother, I know that there was nothing in her brain to be worried about. She would have been accepted at the hospital, and everything would be different right now….
We do not understand or accept the explanation of ‘karma’ as it has been presented to us. We do not feel it was Anni’s destiny to die. It was to live, recover from cancer, and share with the world the secrets of healing through nutrition and detoxification, all in loving interrelationship with the whole earth and one another. She wanted to regain her health, finish her MBBS, and find out the local means and methods for conducting the Gerson Therapy in different climates and conditions throughout the planet. She had an innate interest in biology, chemistry and botany, that would have carried her forward to do so. Just seeing someone of such radiance and intense beauty would have inspired thousands to take a more responsible attitude towards their own health and healing. We are sure of it.
For us, to think that it was Anni’s ‘karma’ to die, is just as hokey as accepting that any of the hereafter and cosmological fables, of any particular religious persuasion are actually real. In our understanding, all of these concepts only exist here, in the place of name and form. They are to comfort, give solace and encourage acceptance for the beings left in the place of name and form. They are irrelevant where Anni is. What we are sure of though, is that our human potential is greater and stronger than any ‘karma’. From this perspective, we lean towards the Marxist idiom, ‘religion is the opiate of the masses’. When we think that it was her ‘karma’ ( and I just want to spit that word out ) we feel crushed, hopeless, innervated. We don’t feel a shred of comfort in such a gruesome, depressing, negative thought. Her destiny was to live and love, and be here now. That this has not happened is a gross example of the human ignorance that surrounded her on all sides, including our own. We had our feelers out, we had our instincts going, but ultimately, we trusted too much in those outside of us.
We have no choice but to accept that she has died. We cannot change that. It’s a miserable fact. Human destiny is in our hands. None of us is limited to some idiotic fantasy of a pre-written script! We will never accept that! Human potential is far greater. As Holy Mother Amma says, proceed with great caution and alertness. We were not able to. We have the duty now, to assume the burden of her work, from the triad of our family, her way to love the human race, which we see through earth ethics in public health, through the joy in music and art. We will not be able to do the beautiful work and make the contribution to human welfare that she was meant to, through her studies and applications of the ways and means for healing and guiding public health through preventive means. Those of you who can, please join us somehow, in spreading her love through alertness and awareness of health issues, means and methods for preventive care. If anyone has the medical background and sincere interest to persue and further advance the studies done in cancer therapy through the common sense scientific principles as those found in the Gerson Therapy, please do so. It will be a boon to mankind.

Loving you,
Kamala Aunty and Link

Dearest Friends and Family,
Today is Krishna Jayanti, the celebration of the birth of Lord Krishna here in India, and perhaps most joyously so, here in Amritapuri. Amma used to adapt the bhav or attitudinal vibration of Krishna when she first began public darshans. Seeing her in that mood, people felt she was genuinely entranced by Krishna, and used to tell her all their problems, which she would then offer succor for….consequently, in Amritapuri, there is the feeling among some that Krishna really is here, in Amma. I am certain that the consciousness of all Masters, being at One-ment, is in Amma, I mean, one is one is one. For us three though, we have never observed any significant difference in Amma when she does Devi Bhava (with the attitudinal vibration of the Goddess aspect or universal feminine principle), or when people dress her up as per their conceptions of Krishna. We see the same Amma, no outer or inner change. But others persist in seeing a different person during those times. We never have though.
Amma used to do Devi Bhava once a week, whatever country she was in. Now she does it at almost every stop on the foreign tours. At the time we came to the ashram, it was once a week here as well. At the end of Devi Bhava, Amma would stand on the stage, and throw flowers at the crowds, then stand still looking at everyone. Our cleaning efforts soon made us realize that the ramp she would be walking down was literally slick with the oils and sand dusts from thousands of feet that had gone for darshan. The handrails were sticky from thousands of hands… The only solution we found to make a non-slippery surface was soap, water and elbow grease. When Amma would be doing the flowers and all, the three of us would use that window of time – from when she got up from her darshan chair, till she walked off the stage - to sweep, scrub and dry the ramp. It also meant cleaning the area that she would descending down the ramp into, as well as creating ‘friendly’ barriers of table rows, so that her sore and aching body would not have to be additionally pummeled by devotees and ashramites seeking yet another ‘blessing’ for themselves. With tables, people could still see her. We never minded not seeing her eyes in the front of the stage where the crowds were. We saw her eyes, and felt their smile in our hearts.
For Link and I, we have made it a quiet day. I made a “Krishna Jayanti” salad – came out quite good. The recipe is: 1 cup fresh grated carrot, 1 cup fresh grated coconut, ¾-1 cup boiled raisins (so they are juicy and plump), curd or yogurt, 1 tblsp. Honey, 1 tblsp jaggery….add the curd until all ingredients have incorporated it well…for some reason, .I felt I should do this little thing, which we shared with our neighbor…Where we are going, where our Anni is, there is no Krishna Jayanti. That reality, we want and need to know.
We arranged living garlands of growing plants around some of the large pictures of Amma in the halls of the flats, and then when the crowds were at their zenith during the Uriyadi festivities, we retired in, and watched an informative movie about Nelson Mandela of South Africa. Uriyadi is a game played in rememberance of Lord Krishna’s playful pranks as a child. He used to climb up to the hanging pots of curd and butter, and break them open and steal the contents. Now, it is played with a swinging pot, filled with watery-milky looking mixture and a few coins, strung up on a high rope, which can be lowered and raised at will by a person who controls the pot. Children dress up like little Krishnas, get sticks, and charge the tantalizingly dangling pot, which is often whisked up at the last split second. Their leaps often crack it. 2 years ago, Anni was able to rush, leap and break the pot….she was glad of it. She wanted to at least once have cracked the pot, and mentally told Amma that…she was getting older, and there are NO older girls who play the game. Because of the way many men’s minds are, it is considered unseemly for young ladies to be running, jumping and getting their clothes wet in front of those minds. The smaller girls get chances in different groups from the boys, without as much representation, either…but, ashram kids are keen to play. To make it a little more challenging, while the players run and leap and swing at the pot, there are people dashing tumeric colored water into their faces and eyes as they near the pot. It stings. This and the yelling of the crowd serves to distract and break concentration… The ground is then slippery and muddy…it’s a real challenge to be able to break the pot…it’s a wonderful game, which usually ends with the ‘big boys’ making a pyramid to reach the pot, then group dancing with loud chants….Amma usually watches from a short distance, with an inwardness that is palpable amidst the running, yelling, swirling crowd of revellers.
Last Krishna Jayanti was a wild escapade. About 3 weeks before the day, a little female cuckoo, the shape of an egg, had come to us, having fallen from a nest after a heavy rain storm that year. The female cuckoo has white spots on black feathers. The males are jet black. She had fallen out of a tree near Amma’s father’s house. Anni has a deep love for cuckoo birds, and prior to this, for over a year, we had raised one, named Mookhi. Mookhi means ‘face’ in Malayalam, or ‘mouth’ in Hindi. She was an only child with us and had also come as a little wee-egg-shape. Anni adored her. We never caged her, as it has always seemed morally wrong to us to cage animals (except in times of need of course). By and large, Mookhi lived in the kitchenette area, but as her wings and flying skills increased, so did her territory…we (the children) used to take her around the ashram, perched on our fingers, when Anni worked on the mosaics she would sit near her, when she stitched, she would be on the machine, when we had music practice, she would perch on some of the kid’s instruments…she would fly a bit, and come back…Anni was always very worried about her, particularly as she began to fly further and further away. The crows, as stated, are merciless. They gang up on, and deliberately torture weaker persons.
Cuckoo birds are unique. When young their eyes are grey-blue, as they mature, they turn red. The red of the male eye is particularly brilliant. The female’s is more brick red. The way that they carry their heads, seems pre-historic. They have a flat topped head, with a distinct cleft between the left and right hemispheres (we assume) of the brain cavity. They tend make downward and side to side movements with head and neck. Cuckoos have a very distinctive whooping call, which they often do around 1 and 2 AM at night.
Cuckoos have been in existence in India for perhaps 100’s of thousands of years. They are mentioned in the Ramayana (one of the four great epics in Hindu literature). The Ramayana also has reference to the construction of a bridge stretching from Rameshwaram, at the tip of India, to Sri Lanka. This bridge has now been seen by NASA satellite photographs (and erroneously named ‘Adam’s’ bridge). The NASA photos date the bridge as being at least 175,000 years old. For a good book on this, see Cremo, M. (2003?) Forbidden Archeology. If this conclusion is true, cuckoos have been around for a very, very long time.
The cuckoo, is perhaps that bird that plays the character of “Maysie” in Horton Hatches the Egg, by Dr. Suess. The mothers are not a nesting bird, and lay their eggs in the nests of other birds, around here, most often that of crows. While doing so, they often roll the original eggs out of the nests. The crow mother then raises her baby cuckoo with love and solicitous concern. Cuckoos have huge appetites, and tend to be frugivores. The crow parents are kept busy and harried looking, meeting the demands of feeding their voracious little one, while other babies that manage to hatch begin to have serious accidents, falling out of the nests, etc, often pushed or bullied over the edge by the cuckoo while the crow parents are off getting more food. In a normal family, the siblings don’t behave like that, and the parents are unsuspecting.
All babies have a way of making the prospect of putting something into their mouths a pleasant one for the parent. Human babies make the most adorable faces when they want to nurse. Cuckoo babies open their mouths like a wild red flower, shaking their heads, so that the brilliant red flower (of their throat tissue) is visually attracting. Given even a crumb, they make the most throaty sounds around it, which make one feel gratified, for having helped to satisfy a seriously starving being. I suspect that for crow parents, feeding genuine crow babies is quite a flat experience compared to their cuckoo sibling.
Mookhi did not tolerate other birds coming into the flat for any length of time. Even Smritti, our darling pigeion, who taught us how to raise baby pigeons nearly seven years ago, was barely tolerated on his perch outside the door. One day, Anni saw Mookhi actually do a little jig, hopping on one foot for a while then the other in an attempt to intimidate Smritti away from the front of our door. I remember her laughter then…we thought we had all the time in the world, to capture another Mookhi jig on film,…for so many things…The adventures of Anni and Mookhi are innumerable. Even after Mookhi had grown up and flown away, Anni continued to call her whenever she heard a distressed cuckoo sound…and one day, we saw Mookhi in a garden at the south end of the ashram. Another day, a female cuckoo feather appeared in the bird bath near our room.
After Anni passed, when I opened her archana book, I found a little Mookhi feather. I still do not know where is my darling who so loved her Mookhi, I still do not know how she is. We want to be with her. It is inconceivable that the life drags on and on without her.
So, a few weeks before KJ 2006, another little female cuckoo had come.. We named her Kala Bala. Anni took Kala Bala to Amma, who scolded her for raising it alone. I prayed company would come for Kala Bala, as both Link and Anni were in college for often 12 and more hours each day. Within 2 days, another little cuckoo, a baby male was given to us. So, we called the female Kala, the male, Bala. Both lived on a series of sticks which we constructed to give the semblance of a natural environment – of differing height ratios, as well as hopping and short flight opportunities. Cuckoo’s however, are really better raised alone if they have to be kept with people. They do not like any siblings. Kala, being bigger, was dominating and aggressive to Bala. Driven by powerful instinct, she sought continually to drive him out of the ‘nest’ in front of the kitchenette window. He was smaller, and suffered the abuse.
With copious amounts of newspaper, we were able to keep up with the liquidy output fairly well. That KJ, the water supply had suddenly run out while I was doing the dishes. I had opened the spigot fully in an effort to keep getting water. I forgot to close the spigot knob. The sink was still full of dishes at odd angles. The water continued to stay off the entire afternoon and into the night. We did not go down for Uriyadi, but watched the proceedings in their newer location near the cow shed, from the temple roof. That night, we went out for the late night KJ festivities – in which Amma sings bhajans, beginning around 11PM, gives a small satsang, then dances, and distributes payasam, usually ending around 1 or 2AM. Anni and I were near the back of the hall. Anni was already not feeling so well, and was absorbed with trying to master the engineering courses. She had brought her mathematics notebook to review. I wanted to go back to the flat and get a small gift for a friend. Anni wanted me to stay with her. So, I stayed another ½ hour, then, another hour, and then felt again I must go back to the flat. She came with me. As we approached the flat, we heard the sound of running water. By then, we had been gone for at least 2 hours. Our threshold has the blessing of being two inches high, as when we initially did construction for the flat, I was concerned about leaving any gap under the door for snakes,(occasional, not common) rats, mice or cockroaches, (very common) as well as water from the hallway during heavy monsoon storms…
We opened the door, and immediately noticed that water was gushing out. To our dismay, the entire flat was submerged in over 3 inches of water. The newspaper, etc., was floating around the room. Dusty, output residues lapped in waves against the walls as we waded in. Our bedding was soaked. Thankfully, the laptops and phone were not on the floor. Kala and Bala were panicked, and had somehow gotten to the highest perch in the kitchenette area – some clothes lines we have high up… and the water was gushing from the kitchette sink, in a fountain, from the back of an up-angled plate. Anni and I were already, both exhausted. We knocked on the doors of the hostel students, and soon had a crew of 5 helping us to bail out the room. It took till nearly 4AM. 18 big buckets, plus. Additionally, I sat near the bathroom, bailing with a one litre scoop for an hour. The entire flat was covered with a mixture of water, dirt, liquidy output….wet papers, bedding, etc. Amazingly, Link was gone during this time, having fallen asleep in the hall….
That was KJ 2006…it was an amazing year in terms of bird output – there are other stories, but not for now. Kala and Bala eventually went to the home of the director for People for Animals in Kollam, our dear friend, Professor Thangachi. As they became more and more mobile, the liquidy output, the small size of our flat, all became somewhat intolerable to me…One day, I’d had it, and insisted that the universe help solve our living problem. I felt it was a grace that they left. Their lives were not so smooth, however. Kala beat up Bala terribly one day and he succumbed to his wounds. She later grew up enough to fly away, and did so.
We will try to find photos of Anni’s beloved Mookhi and put them up. I may be able to get one of her first Krishna Jayanti when she was 10.
So, that’s Krishna Jayanti, 2006 and 2007. Our lives are very different now.

Loving you,
Kamala Aunty